What I Watched: Star Wars (1977-1983)

The first movies I started watching on the 100 Classic Movies list were those in the Star Wars film series, even though they weren't the first ones I wrote about. It took a little time for me to get through them all with the turnaround from Netflix on the one-disk-at-a-time plan and the fact that I was really lazy about watching them and sending them back in a timely manner. I love Space, but, to be honest, I was really not interested in watching these. Before watching them I was already familiar with the franchise because, well, who isn't? Star Wars references are very prominent in American pop culture. AND I've seen Fanboys, Spaceballs, and the Family Guy Star Wars episode.

Via Wikimedia Commons

When I worked at a bookstore there was a girl there who was a major Star Wars fan. She watched the movies regularly, read all the books, and won Star Wars trivia at DragonCon every year. She loved all things Yoda and had a shrine dedicated to him in her bedroom. She had to drive me somewhere once and we listened to the Star Wars soundtrack on her tape deck. Writing this out really makes it seem like I am making her up. Like this is a caricature of the stereotypical Star Wars fan, but I assure you she was real. And multifaceted. She did have other interests. At the time I found her insufferable and we didn't get along very well. We've lost touch and now I wish we hadn't.  Also, while researching for this post, I discovered articles about all manner of strange things, like how inefficient the Death Star's trash compactor is for the size of the ship, etc. Star Wars fans are serious, yo, and I think this is where my aversion came from.

I always assumed these were serious movies, along the lines of Star Trek, but my first impression was that they were much more comical than I expected. The overall storyline is serious, but there is a lot of comic relief and some really beloved characters. Here is a summary of my thoughts once it was all over:

1. C-3PO is the best character. Don't argue with me about this because there is no argument to be made. Actually, an argument was made, so let me fervently address it before moving forward. This article is poorly written, but aside from that the author states that C-3PO is a more annoying character than Jar Jar Binks. Blasphemy! C-3PO may not be the most useful character, but annoying he definitely is not. He is a charming companion for R2D2. He is so posh with his fancy speech, uptight mannerisms, and oil spa baths. Even his obvious anxiety disorder, if droids can have one, is precious. He has so much personality for a robot and provides many comedic moments in the narrative. I read the Wikipedia article about him to get a little more insight and discovered that one of his specialties is etiquette. Naturally. 



C-3PO at the San Diego Museum of Man via public domain.

2. Princess Leia is a bad ass. Everyone knows that Leia is Luke Skywalker's long-lost sister and the daughter of Darth Vader, but that is all I knew about her before watching these movies. She is also a member of the Imperial Senate and a spy for the Rebel Alliance. It should also be noted that she has expert aim with the plasma blaster guns, which seemed to really be an anomaly in these movies. She does not tolerate idiocy, fights alongside the guys, and she will f- you up. No wonder she was every Star Wars geek's wet dream.

I love this Princess Leia tattoo so much. skyemariah via HCSWS.  

3. Luke Skywalker is a whiny and incompetant moron. The fate of the universe depends on him and maybe that is a lot of pressure for anyone, but I almost couldn't stand him. In the beginning I was thinking he was really going to have to step it up if I'm going to get on his side. My co-worker has the theory that Luke Skywalker represents a cinematic Everyman. He is plucked from his ordinary, unremarkable like and thrust into an extraordinary circumstance in which he has to overcome great obstacles. He is a regular guy, but is also ultimately posited as the hero. This is probably how the viewer is supposed to feel, but I just could not get there with Mark Hamill. This article Why Star Wars sucks actually asserts that Han Solo is the everyman hero of the original trilogy and I wholeheartedly agree with that. Also, Luke ranks #14 on Empire Magazine's 100 Greatest Fictional Characters. Ack. Why does everyone like him so much? These are the only acceptable Luke Skywalkers:





4. Han Solo and Chewbacca are the cutest best friends ever. Frankly, if I had my way, saving the galaxy would have been up to Princess Leia with the assistance of Chewie and Han. Leave Luke Skywalker out of it. I completely get why Han Solo is a heartthrob: He is the quintessential bad boy. Ann C. Crispin's backstory of how Han and Chewbacca met (as depicted in the The Han Solo Trilogy) is so sweet. In this history Han is a pilot who is ordered by the Imperial Navy to capture and skin a Wookiee named Chewbacca who has commandeered a naval ship carrying Wookiee children to slavery. Han refuses and is publicly degraded and Chewie vows a life of indebtedness in gratitude. They become fast friends and go together into the business of smuggling. Also, he and Chewbacca are extremely capable fighters and space navigators and, besides, look how cute they are as a team: 


Calvin and Hobbes as Han and Chewie by Chris Wahl, Bill Waterson, Rabittooth via DeviantArt and Creative Commons. 

5. No one in the entire galaxy is good at shooting a laser gun, except Princess Leia. Or it is remarkable how poorly calibrated those guns are. Evidently, the problem is that they are shooting plasma gas. Everyone knows that plasma gas is unpredictable and

that "the inherent instability of plasma gas in blasters reduced the weapon's accuracy under sustained fire." I told you that fans were serious. I was looking for other articles criticizing the accuracy of these gun or at least commenting on how comical the gun fighting sequences are because lasers are flying but no one gets hit, but what I found were explanations. It seems to me that with all this advanced technology someone would have said, "let's not use plasma in guns since it sucks."

6. This is old news but a petition to the White House to commission the building of a Death Star received enough votes to warrant an official response. It is pretty hilarious and shows the Obama administration has a sense of humor. They officially decline building a Death Star citing the project's proposed cost ($850 trillion), the craft's fundamentally flawed design, and the administrations oppositions to destroying planets as reasons against the project. Lolz, White House. You guys are so clever. After the petition response is published Governor Wilhuff Tarkin of the Outer Rim Territories released a statement on the Star Wars blog stating that the inhabitants of Earth are too primitive and unpredictable to handle such a  powerful weapon as the Death Star and our possession of such a craft would be a "technological terror...used to upset the peace and sanctity of the citizens of the Galactic Empire." Touche, Star Wars geeks, touche. You, too, are quite clever. 

Bonus:: My favorite comment from Donnie: 

Me: What is Jabba and what is his role in all this?

Donnie: He's a gelatinous kingpin.

Anyway, I don't think I really need to include a discussion of why these movies should or shouldn't be on the 100 Classic Movies list, BUT I will state that all 6 movies in the Star Wars franchise have been nominated for or won Academy Awards, they have a vast and rabid fanbase, they are the basis of a rich and storied fictional universe, and Star Wars references are so familiar to Western collective consciousness that we get them whether we've seen the movies or not. So, do they belong on the list? Yes they do.

Do you agree?

What I Watched:: The Hobbit: An Unexpected Journey

I worked at a bookstore when the Lord of the Rings trilogy was coming out in the theater and we had huge displays of the books in a ridiculous number of formats (with and without pictures, with and without annotations, trade paperback, mass market paperback, hardcover, leatherbound, with action figures, with paper dolls...) and I was completely indifferent to the phenomenon. People raved ad nauseum about how fantastic the books were, but since I was a bit of a book snob at the time, I paid them no mind.

Fast forward to now: Donnie's parents gave us a gift card to the movies and we decided to use it to see The Hobbit: An Unexpected Journey, the first in a trilogy prequel to The Lord of the Rings trilogy (say that three times fast). I have now seen the Lord of the Rings movies and liked them very much. It has been a while since Donnie and I have gone on a date, so we seized the opportunity and took Lucas to Donnie's mom's house. I took a photo of Donnie and myself before the movie started. The lighting was terrible and I look like I should have been going to see Twilight, which, don't get me wrong, I also saw in the theater.
 

While The Hobbit was on many a summer reading list, I never read it and all I knew going into the movie was that it would explain how Bilbo Baggins came to be in possession of the infamous ring. There ends up being a lot more to the story as it is actually about how the dwarf race was displaced from their homeland by a gold-coveting dragon and Bilbo Baggins is relunctantly recruited to assist them in returning. Thus, the journey begins. 

The Hobbit: An Unexpected Journey Trailer

I did a Google search to see how faithful the film adaptation is to the book and, interestingly, the first several hits were about a new Hobbit-themed Denny's menu. I told my co-worker about this and he said he saw some commercials on T.V. and the running joke was that the movie was about the Denny's menu. I somehow completely missed this and it sounds silly to me, but there was a funny scene in the movie when the dwarves eat a meal with the elves and are offered a large amount of lettuces, which dwarves are, evidently, not accustomed to eating. One dwarf comically says, "I do not eat green foods," while ungratefully turning up his nose. There is also another scene where Gollum threateningly wonders what Hobbitses taste like and there are notably no items named for Gollum on this menu. Too bad.

In the movie we learn that there are five wizards like Gandalf the Grey, including Saruman the White whom we met in LOTR, and here we meet another: Radagast the Brown. He is pretty much awesome. He lives a solitary life because he prefers the company of animals to people. He has a lichen growing on the side of his face, a bird nesting under his hat, communicates with animals in the woods like Snow White, and commands a sled pulled by rabbits that can run faster than the hellhound-type creatures the Orcs ride. There is some controversy amongst Tolkien purists about the portrayal of Radagast in the film, but I found him to be charming and loveable. 

Radagast the Brown


My favorite part of the movie was my discovery of the dwarf warrior cutie Kili, played by Irish actor Aidan Turner. Throughout the entire movie I thought he was the dwarf king's son due to their physical resemblence, but he is actually the nephew. Here is a tumblr tag thread with photos and GIFs if that's your thing. He is the youngest of the dwarf crew and he apparently dies in an epic battle in the book that will reportedly serve as the climax of the Hobbit trilogy. Le sigh.

Aidan Turner as Kili. (Image courtesy of IMDB)

Come to find out, Aidan Turner stars in the U.K. version of Being Human, which is always recommended to me on Netflix and I never really paid it any attention. I tried watching the American version, but could never really get into it. Obviously, I will be watching the U.K. edition now. I also discovered, through my internet stalking research, that Mr. Turner will play Luke Garroway in the film adaptation of Cassandra Clare's The Mortal Instruments. I really loved that series, so I am now looking forward to that as well.

I just realized that I am portraying myself to be a fantasy nut (note I am also currently reading Ender's Game) and while I definitely have embraced the geekery more that I used to, I never realize until now to what extent. Maybe I am making a new discovery about myself. Anyway, have you seen or read any of these titles? What did you think?